The Boroughers

Tuesday, 15th February 2011.
nPower League Two
Stevenage (not Borough) 0 OUFC 0

Why does it always fucking rain when we play at Stevenage? Last night was my 5th visit to Broadhall Way and other than an August Bank Holiday visit back in 2007, I remember vividly getting pissed on to and from every game.

Another thing that always seems to happen is that we fail to win. Sadly this means that should we have the misfortune to find ourselves in the same division as this charlatan non-league outfit again next season, I'll probably have to get wet again in the vain hope we'll beat them on their soggy, muddy patch.

For me, the trip to Stevenage on a Tuesday night is not a difficult one - my normal train home from work arriving at St Pancras in good time to hop over to adjacent Kings Cross and get the packed commuter train North from there - first stop Stevenage just 20mins later.

The problem with arriving at Stevenage by train though is that the ground is just under 2 miles away and a pig of a walk along the new-town's many roundabout underpasses and long, boring conecting roads with nothing but retail parks for the view. The concrete structures around the train station and pedestrianised shopping areas of Stevenage remind you of what they thought the near-future would look like in 1970s sci-fi films. Only a bit run-down and grubby. If you've seen 'Conquest of the Planet of the Apes', you'll know what I mean.

One of my very best friends used to live in Stevenage and always used to go on about how good a place it is to live because of it's connections to London. I'd agree with him- the best thing about Stevenage is that it's easy to get the fuck away from the place quickly once you are at the station. The trouble is getting to and from the station though amidst a concrete nightmare of the town centre.


Stevenage: Is it just me or does it look like an airport?

 See, I'm too mean to get a taxi, and too aloof to share a bus with locals. so I walked in the rain to the ground. I wish I'd just found a taxi by the time the drizzle had taken it's toll on my inappropriate rainwear, when i stopped half-way for a warming apple pie in one of the ubiquitous McDonald's (the third one I'd walked past).

It didn't warm me or my soggy jeans up, but it certainly did scorch the inside of my mouth. I'd have complained but they did clearly warn me about the potential molten contents on the packaging. Lesson learnt.

So I rejoined the drizzle and found my way to the miserably tin-pot 'Lamex Stadium' of Stevenage FC. Yes, that's right - they appear to have had a name-makeover since being (incorrectly in my view) admitted to the Football League this season.

Apparently the dropping of the 'Borough' was an attempt to make the club look a bit less non-league with all the mickey-mouse connotations that the affix is thought to have in people's mind. If they really want to try and impress us though with affected Football League credentials, they could move Stevenage to a real town rather than one built 30 years ago and not have a drummer as the only noise coming out of their home end. Plus it's a bit half-hearted to still have 'Boro' as their official nickname. Why not pick something apt like the "Contretists" or "Roundabouters" ?


Pre-Match Huddle

I'm procrastinating a bit as the game itself wasn't really much to write home about. It looked as though it might be, with both sides rattling the woodwork within the first 4 minutes - but there wasn't really much else to write home about for the remainder of the game, save for a second rattle of the post by Craddock and an unnervingly physical game that at times Oxford seemed to struggle with from a typical niggly Stevenage side.

2nd half especially, Oxford looked a bit short of ideas - although we did have a few good chances late in the game when we pressured the goal at the end that we were sat in. Here are a few low-grade action shots of that period of pressure.

Not very good are they? Well, neither was the game, so it's giving you a fair reflection. Still, positives are it was another decent clean sheet, and 4 points from the week is a good haul against two sides also still very much 'in the mix'.

So, another 90mins at Stevenage and another draw there, our 4th in 5 visits. Now it was time to get back to the station. I decided I could do with some exercise, plus it was no longer raining so I bust a gut to get the earlier train back to the Big Smoke. I made it with seconds to spare, to find out the bastard was delayed. OK, only by 4 minutes, but I was still annoyed after all that running that I might have been able to take a breather.

Made some new friends on the platform who were excited about something or other and having some exuberant pictures of themselves taken before getting their train to London. Perhaps they were celebrating how easy it was to get out of Stevenage. Good on them.

Girls Leaving Stevenage: Excited.

Millers Crossing

Saturday, 12th February 2011.
nPower League Two
OUFC 2 Rotherham United 1


The U's are going up! The U's are going up! And now you're gonna believe us...etc., etc.

You start thinking it might actually be our year when things start dropping in our favour. Yes we battered Rotherham at times in that 2nd half, but we might have even ended up coming away with nothing thanks to an annoyingly fine display from a 70-year old man in the Rotherham goal and the inability of Le Fondre to put away a gilt-edged chance with minutes to spare.

You could point to bad luck in that we should have been coasting with 20mins to go, especially after the two one-on-ones that Beano failed to finish from. But it was beginning to look like 'one of those days' as shot after shot was either squandered or turned wide by the liver-spotted hand of Andy Warrington. Some of his reaction saves in that second half were first class in fact, and as great an advert for the beneficial affects of Cod Liver Oil pills as you are likely to find.

The Rotherham keeper claims another loose ball

So well was the old-timer playing in fact that it looked like he'd kept out MacLean's penalty with another fine reaction save. Luckily, the luck was with the lucky boys, and as he seemed to explain to Big Steve whilst waiting for a corner delivery shortly afterwards, the ball caught him on the inside of his wrist. Bad luck old feller, good luck Oxford. 2-1.
Anyway I've babbled too much about the actual game - I'm sure most people reading this are more interested in what I got up to before and after the game, aren't you?

Well I'm going to tell you anyway.

No drive up the M40 this week as I'd spent Friday night at the in-laws in Reading, so it was a relaxing country drive up the A4074 instead. I love that road. I used to do it every day for a number of years when I lived in Oxford and worked in Henley and still know the position of every bend and pot-hole on the stretch between Nuneham Courtney and Crowmarsh Gifford. One of the potholes near Benson has got a little bigger in the past few years though, so my efforts to drive round it by memory alone without reducing my speed saw me slam my front wheels in to the corner of the hole and nearly lose control and end up in an adjacent field. Luckily, the luck was smiling on the lucky today, as already established. So instead I just soiled myself slightly and decided to be a bit more careful, and perhaps stop for some wet-wipes at the next garage.

After my normal pre-match pint in the Blackbird, I took leave of my senses and didn't go to Branos for a spicy chicken burger. For some reason, I decided to go elsewhere. It might have been that I just felt like a change. It might have been that it seemed like too much effort to walk out of my way on this occasion. Or it might have been the fact that at the last game I seemed to contract a mild dose of food poisoning (which might or might not have been down to the spicy chicken burger, my legal advisors have asked me to point out) and I didn't fancy an afternoon on the toilets in the Kassam.

So I thought I'd play it safe and check out the fishcakes on offer at the Fish & Chip shop. I'm afraid the fishcake wasn't as good as the one from Gillingham last weekend, and my request to have extra vinegar on the chips seemed to have been taken that I would like to eat a vinegar soup with chip croutons.

I'll be honest - these establishments are never going to get into the Egon Ronay guides unless they listen more attentively to their customers.

Fishcake & Chips: Vinegary.

My heart screaming at me to cease digesting the acidic broth, I eventually stumbled down to the ground and into another exciting footballing adventure.

Once again, the excitement was mostly in the last 20mins and consisted yet again of Oxford failing to do it the easy way and keeping us with squeaky bums right up until the final whistle - but we did it again, another 3 points and a great performance.

I hate to focus too much on the game itself when there is so much fast-food based content to spew out at you, but I must tell you that I am very excited about the new lad Hackney. Looked a touch of class when he came on, terrorised their back line with his pace and could be a very effective impact partnership with Potter, especially if brought on together for the last 30 minutes.

Still early days and of course Wilder will be judged on the end of season rather than mid-Feb position, but how many people at the moment look as though they might be eating their words about the players he's let go compared to what he's brought in to replace them?

It's looking pretty good right now, don't you think?

Gillingham Taylforth

Saturday, 5th February 2011.
nPower League Two

Gillingham 0 OUFC 0

 
Bah, what a bore-draw that was! I didn't really enjoy this one - thought both sides were pretty mediocre to be honest and no amount of  "but it is a good point away from home"-ing from other fans can change my mind on this. We were average, they were average, the point was earned through attrition and lack of adventure. There, that's that said.

Getting down to Gillingham was a doddle for me. As I go through North Kent everyday on the train to and from work, I simply had to hop on the HighSpeed line from St Pancras and pay an extra £5 from Ebbsfleet to get me to the wonders of Gillingham.

My, my - what a delightfully shit town this is. A lot of people from the South of England probably have a conception as the North of our wonderful country to be 'run-down' and have the most crappy towns. A quick trip to Gillingham may have you thinking again.

The word 'bleak' might well have been invented to describe Gillingham.* I know Oxford have their fair share of Chavs on show at every away day, but this little enclave of North Kent seemed to have been broadcasting a trance-inducing Pikey-signal, drawing them in from all around to mope about aimlessly on the streets like a scene from Dawn of the Dead.



The Rt. Hon MP for Gillingham North


Every fake burberry-capped, spotty, tracksuit-wearing oaf and every WKD-swigging teenage mother with scraped-back peroxide hair seem to have congregated in Gillingham on Saturday to hang about outside the dodgy fried chicken outlets and no doubt sniff some glue, or whatever it is the displaced yoofs of today get up to (To be honest my cultural references to these wasted generations hasn't really been updated since 1980s Grange Hill).

I might be being unfair to Gillingham - it might have it's nice points. Just I didn't notice them on my visit. I did meet a friendly Oxford face on the train down though, and joined him and a few other Yellows for a few pre-match pints in a pub opposite the station - typically dingy but quite a welcoming watering hole to be fair. It might well be a run-down town, but I will admit that it wasn't an unfriendly place.

Although if any of the residents read this blog they may be waiting for me with pitchforks and torches next time we play there.

Oooh, Sauce!



I ended up getting a little drunk before the game and in need of spicy-burger refreshment to sober up somewhat. Sadly, there is no Branos in Gillingham and I didn't like the look of Kent Fried Chicken in town.

So instead I followed my nose to the ground and found a well-placed Turkish-run place and ordered a fishcake and chips. I also took some rather arty shots of the inside of the takeaway, that I think highlights to you just how pissed I was.



Fishcake-Dispensing Action!



I can however heartily recommend their fishcakes, next time you happen to be in the area. Very well-fried.

The entrance for away fans to Gillingham's ground is an odd one, with away turnstiles placed at the dead-end of a residential cul-de-sac of mostly run-down terrace housing.

Mind you, if I lived there, I might not bother to do up the front of my house too much, considering the heavy footfall of away fans each season that might enjoy relieving themselves in my front garden or chucking their rubbish at my windows.

That said, I doubt very much if I'd ever find myself living there in the first place, actually.



Away Turnstiles, Gillingham

Inside the ground, the temporary away seating held together with precarious-looking scaffolding was still there from my previous visit in 2005. I had assumed at the time it was temporary, at least. Seeing as how it's Six years later and still there though, I'd say it has a feeling of permanence about it. Although, it felt at any moment as though that permanency would soon be tested when the Oxford fans at the back started doing the 'Jump up if you love Oxford' song.

The view under my seat. Terrifying.

Mind you, at least the threat of almost perishing amidst a collapsing jungle of scaffolding made the 90mins interesting. As it was, the most interesting bit of the day was that fishcake.

Here are a couple more pictures of Priestfield Road - I don't have much else to say, as it was a fairly uneventful journey home.


Priestfield Road: Gillingham.



Oh, there was also the bloke that threatened to smack my head in because I took a picture of a placard in the back seat of his car that read "My Fucking Brother". Quite a funny story actually.



My Fucking Brother: "I just had to tell people, Bro".



*It wasn't though.

I Can't Think of a Pun on 'Cheltenham'

Saturday, 29th January 2011.
nPower League Two
OUFC 1 Cheltenham Town 1

Well, that was alright, wasn't it?

No victory to crow about this morning and honours even over the two legs of the first 'Cotswolds Derby' season in 5 years. But another great team performance and things are looking tasty for the remainder of the season.

Another late start for myself for this one, only leaving London at noon for the drive up the M40. I've started to enjoy that drive of late, which I'm sure is in no small part thanks to our recent form on the pitch. It's a great feeling getting into the car and driving out of central London on a Saturday, towards the open green spaces of the shires. I always do a little "yaaay!" to myself whenever I go through Stokenchurch Gap and Oxfordshire opens up in front of me - such a wonderful presentation of our beloved county to the eyes. I also now know the position of every speed camera, every bend in the road and every traffic bottleneck between Tottenham Court Road and Blackbird Leys. Which is handy.

Stokenchurch Gap: Majestic Gateway

For those of you logging my spicy chicken burger pursuits (and I know some of you are), yes I can re-assure you that Branos did receive my custom before the game, and they seem to be back on their game after our little falling out early this season. Perhaps they have read this blog and cleaned up their customer service act a little as a result. A fine delectable pre-match spicy treat, delivered with a smile. Well done.

I like to get into the ground a little earlier these days, especially as I'm usually driving so can't cram pints in until 2.50pm in the Blackbird, so I was in my seat a good 30 minutes before kick off. I was thus witness to the sight of two dozen scantily-clad teenage girls prancing around in the centre circle as we were treated to a routine from Oxford Brookes' cheerleading squad.

Now, I'm not one to balk at the idea of a little pre-match entertainment, especially of the jiggling young bodies kind, but there is something about this Americanisation of pre-match entertainment that just doesn't work on a cold, grey day in England. I've been to many sporting venues in the States and Cheerleading is very much a welcome part of the furniture there - but it just seems slightly ridiculous at a League Two game of football, as echoes of 'get your tits out for the lads' ring around the ground, nearly drowning out the Britney Spears soundtrack.


Cheerleaders: It didn't look like this.


It's also a sign of my age that rather than join in the chant, I was tutting at the length of their skirts and thinking "They'll catch an awful chill in this weather."

Anyway, the game itself was a frustrating affair given our dominance for much of the 90mins, but I left the ground in rather high spirits, all things considered. It's easy to think of it as two points dropped rather than 1 gained, but you can't win every game and frankly if we continue to play such beautiful attacking football as that we will not drop too many more points this season.

My only concern is the leakiness at the back. Defending at set pieces and general sloppiness at times has meant we are conceding far too easily despite dominating matches. Someone said to me before the game on Saturday that they don't care how many goals we leak if we go and score at the other end - that they'd rather we played like Keegan's Newcastle and win every game 4-3.

Trouble is, Keegan's Newcastle didn't actually win anything. And although we are scoring goals, we are not putting away enough chances to score 3 or 4 in a game, so these defensive frailties are a slight concern. If we are serious about going up this year, we'll still need to grind out a few 1-0 victories along the way, and learn how to keep clean sheets.

Still, I don't want to sound all pessimistic as the performances of late have actually been top class on the whole and we should be very proud of the squad Wilder has now put together - it's working. His tinkering has seemed worth it, after all.

It IS working. And that is a very good thing indeed.

Cheltenham Nearly Man

Tomorrow afternoon we take on Cheltenham Town in "The Cotswolds Derby" (as this fixture has been christened by the media in the past, despite not really being a derby and Oxford not being in the Cotswolds).

This is a fixture that although reasonably local, may not feel that much of a derby for most amongst the two sets of fans. For me though, it’s one that always pricks my interest – for I have a now long-distant association with the town of Cheltenham.

It could have been oh so different for me, tomorrow. But for a twist of fate I might have been amongst the away fans, you see. A very tenuous twist of fate perhaps, but nonetheless I’ll expand and waffle for a few paragraphs, as you have come to expect…


Whaddon Road with my Cotswold homelands behind.



Had I become a Cheltenham fan, I wouldn’t have seen the agony of relegation after relegation, as my side tumbled and stumbled from the top flight to non-league in the space of 18 years. Instead I would have seen my side promoted from Southern League obscurity in 1997, before finding a way into the Football League only five years later.

Instead of watching Oxford in our non-league low ebb, I’d have been excited by a Cheltenham team playing at their highest (to date) pinnacle – even reaching the dizzy heights of League One.

I wouldn’t have been amongst 33,000 ecstatic Yellows at Wembley last May, but I’d have been at the Millennium Stadium in May 2006, watching Cheltenham reach that vertigous League One height just a few weeks after a team in yellow down the road that I didn’t really give a monkey’s about had dropped out of the football league.

The reason this might have happened is that I grew up in the Cotswolds town of Moreton-in-Marsh, a mere 22 miles from Whaddon Road. In those early-teen years before I discovered the joys of the London Road, the young FMO was a regular visitor to Cheltenham, the nearest decent-sized town to my home.



Badlands Cheltenham:  Music on Sale Here.


In the summer I would regularly catch the Pulham’s bus to Cheltenham and go shopping in Badlands Record shop for the latest grunge & death metal releases, before hanging out in the park opposite Whaddon Road, chatting about Kurt Cobain with similarly disaffected youths. It seemed such an adventure for a 14 year old boy to be off gallivanting in another town and I have very fond memories of lazy Saturday afternoons spent wandering around Cheltenham’s town centre.


Regent Arcade: Cheltenham: Exciting


I even went on my first ever proper date in Cheltenham, where I treated Becky Cother to a coke float in PizzaLand, before a Graham Gooch book-signing event in the Regent shopping arcade caught my eye. I later wondered if this particular Cheltenham adventure had some part in why that particular relationship didn’t work out.

Back then, despite liking football, the thought of spending an afternoon watching non-league dross was far from being on my ‘to do’ list. I’d never even noticed that the club existed to be honest – so ignorant were my young, innocent eyes to anything other than the Football League and the fledgling Premiership.

So despite my very fond attachment to the town of Cheltenham, it was east and to the city of Oxford that I eventually drifted – for some League football, no less. I was taken to The Manor Ground by a friend’s father one eventful afternoon in Jan 1994 and I haven’t looked back since - I was hooked.

Rarely did I ever even venture to Cheltenham again in fact, until our paths crossed on the football pitch many years later of course. For every Saturday from then was pretty much spent heading up the Manor Ground to watch Oxford with a couple of school friends.

How different things might have been had I had a friend who’s Dad watched Cheltenham, rather than Oxford, perhaps? Or if I’d been just a few years younger, and had caught the buzz around the town during Cheltenham’s rise to the Football League? If it’d been 2006 rather than 1996 when I was gallivanting around Cheltenham, Oxford would have been the non-league club and Cheltenham the nearest ‘decent’ team.

I would almost certainly have gone along to Whaddon Road were that the case. Perhaps it wouldn’t have instilled the same excitement in me that the London Road did all those years ago, but things would certainly have been different and I doubt I’d have ever found my way to Oxford subsequently.

These might be rather tenuous (and, well, frankly a little farcical) ‘what ifs’ – but nonetheless the scenario did make me think how different my life might have been had I taken the A429 rather than the good old A44.

My whole centre of gravity would have shifted westwards – I never would have lived in Oxford, nor gone to university here, and probably today I’d be living in Bristol rather than London. I’d never have met my wife, as I’d have no reason to be in her home-town of Reading, where I lived for a time in order to easily get back to Oxford for games. I’d probably have pickled my liver on scrumpy cider, too.

I’m sure there are some lovely people that I’d have got to know supporting Cheltenham, but I’d never have come to know all the brilliant people I know through supporting Oxford over all these years, either.

Worst of all though, I’d have been happily chanting ‘Come on you Robins’ tomorrow afternoon whilst wearing a red scarf around my neck. The whole thing makes me shudder.
Thank heavens for fate, and Up those Yellows!

Djoumin to do that?



Djoumin Sangare: Instant Legend.

 Our new signing Djoumin 'Jimmy' Sangare looks like he has the potential to become one of those players that will go down in U's folklore for being a bit of a character.

He signing has generated a lot of excitement and speculation, something that adds further to his folk hero potential. He was a living legend at York City and even has his own Djoumin Sangare Appreciation Society page on Facebook.

There is also a video compilation of his finest moments on you tube here. It's quite an impressive selection, although it might be noted that the poster of the video, a certain 'MrDjoumin', might have had a motive behind making sure the video showed him in the most favourable of lights. That there might also be another potential video out there showing him getting constantly nutmegged, falling over and scoring spectacular own goals should also be a consideration before we fall in love with the man!

I'm already enjoying his yellow player interviews this week though. He's a Muslim, so he told us in his first interview. It may seem an irrelevant comment, but I like to know the religious persuasions of the players.

That Jimmy feels the need to tell us of his dedication to Islam as a way of introduction tells me he is a committed individual that will always give his all to the cause, you see. Very good too.

Is Tonkin a Methodist? Perhaps Sammy Deering is a Mormon? How has Beano learnt to kept his cool so well of late? Meditative Buddhism? Who knows? I wish I did.

You can tell a lot about a player from his religious persuasion. Certainly, we have had quite a few 7th Day Adventists play for us over the years, considering their unwillingness to do anything on a Saturday.

Anyway, back to Jimmy. I was also happy to hear he already knew quite a few of the other players - Purkiss of course whilst recently at York; Damien Batt when they were at St Albans together a few years back. But more importantly he played alongside Ryan Clarke at Salisbury - and it's important that a centre-back forms a good relationship with his keeper.

Thankfully, Clarke and Sangare need no introductions to each other, it seems.





Bantam Wait

Saturday, 15th January 2011

nPower League Two

OUFC 2 Bradford City 1

The last time Oxford played Bradford at home was in December 1998, when we were both in the 2nd tier of English Football. They beat us on that occasion, 1-0. They also ended up finishing 2nd and being promoted to the Premiership that season, whilst we went in the other direction in what would become the eventual decline out of the football league for our recent wilderness years.

Hard to believe then that the Bradford team going up to the Premiership would pretty soon after find themselves following a similar spiral to us so that we met again this weekend in the basement tier of the Football League. The difference being after the drop out of the League, most Oxford fans are surely pretty grateful to be here. For Bradford fans though I'm sure most are still coming to terms with their rapid decline that finds them where they are.

As one old pundit might have said whilst scratching his bulging balls at half-time during the Milk Cup final, "Funny old game, isn't it?"

I'd been looking forward to this game for a few days. It had a big game feel about it, being the two best supported sides in League Two, currently. I was excited. After promising myself never to have a Branos spicy burger again, I even thought "what the hey" and went and got one of the zingy treats for the walk down to the stadium. I got garlic mayonnaise all over my pigging coat in the process. Nadgers. Then I bit into a jalapeno and it's searing pickled heaty liquid splashed into my eye. Double Nadgers. It was going to be one of those days I thought.

And it so nearly was. How many of us thought it just wasn't our day as the 70minute mark passed and chance after chance was put wide, tipped over the bar or inexplicably blocked on the goal-line in a manner that seemed to defy the laws of physics?

True, it was a ridiculous goal to concede early on to a mediocre and unadventurous Bradford side. From then on in though, there was only one team in it. If there is a single Bradford player, fan or official that genuinely thinks they deserved even a point out of that game, they need to be sectioned immediately. They wouldn't be looking at the game through rose-tinted glasses - they would be 100ft lead-lined, sound-proofed screens they would be standing behind to come to that conclusion.

In the post match interview, Chris Wilder made mention of the "55 chances" we had on the day. The fact of the matter is, it really didn't feel as though it was that far off this figure. We were amazing. Every player out there was amazing. Six wins from Seven. 1 point off the play-offs. 6 from automatic spots.

We can do this, you know.

We really can.

I'm excited.