Brizzle'd

An article By Fantastic Mr Ox that originally appeared in the matchday programme v. Bristol Rovers - 8.10.11.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
These are the games you look forward to at home, are they not? The ones against the teams that always tend to bring a decent away following. The Bradfords, the AFC Wimbledons, the Bristol Rovers’ of League Two.

I’m sure many other League Two teams feel that same thing about us when our visit to their place approaches.

“Ooh, Oxford – they always travel well - probably the best supporters in the Football League, I’d wager” they probably say.

“Yes, especially that fellow that does those brilliant articles in their programme – have you read them? Hilarious! And worth the cover price on it’s own in my opinion. I think he should have more than just the one page, myself” would probably be what follows, I’m sure.

But today, that fellow that does those articles won’t be here to appreciate the carnival atmosphere of the big-game crowd. Yet again, I’m neglecting my duties to instead spend a weekend ‘away with the wife’ (I’m not sure why I put quote marks around that as it wasn’t a euphemism for anything else, I’m genuinely just going away for the weekend).

It’s my wedding anniversary, you see. Now hold on, hold on – before you go firing off about how much of a disgrace I am, shouldn’t get married in the football season and all that yada yada, I should point out that it’s not quite what you think.

If I’d really wanted to come today, I probably could have done. Yes, that’s right – my wife is quite nice like that, she would actually let me go to a game on my 1st wedding anniversary without a fuss. But I suggested, in the interests of being a good husband, that it might actually be nice to go away for the weekend; even if it did mean missing a home game.

Now, this act of self-sacrifice impressed my wife so much she suggested I didn’t need to miss the game – we could go away for the weekend AS WELL AS going to the game, by booking a hotel for the Saturday night.

How about that then? Brownie points earned, plus no football-free sacrifice made in the process. This being married lark is a doddle!

So I left my beloved to book a nice hotel for the Saturday night in Oxford (we live in London, you see), and looked forward to a nice meal somewhere in Jericho after the game Saturday evening, and perhaps a Sunday morning stroll across Port Meadow before returning to the big smoke. It was going to be a great weekend.
That was until I suddenly wondered a few hours later why she had asked me who we were playing. I’d not thought about it at the time, but she’d never asked me before who the opponents were when I’d gone off to a game. Oh no…she hasn’t has she? SURELY not…?

FMO: “Ummm, have you booked that hotel yet, dear?”

MrsFMO: “Yes! Just did so – had to pay upfront but got a really good deal. Oh and booked the train tickets too.”

FMO : “You booked it in Bristol, didn’t you?”

MrsFMO: “Well, yes – that’s what you said isn’t it? Bristol Rangers? I assume they are actually from Bristol?”

FMO : “Yes, yes they are….the tickets are non-refundable, you say?”

MrsFMO: “That’s right – but what’s the problem?”

FMO: *sigh* “Oh, no problem. But do you know what? Let’s just spend the day together in Bristol. I won’t actually go to the game, would rather just look round the city with you, my love.”

MrsFMO: “Really? Oh thanks darling – you really are the BEST husband ever!

And so I am. See you next time…hopefully.

Up The U’s!

Bristol City Centre: Romantic Getaway.

Clifton Suspension Bridge: Impressive work, Isambard.